Tuesday, January 10, 2012
One of my pet peeves when I was single was when married acquaintances looked at me, rolled their eyes and said "you know, marriage isn't a bed of roses, it isn't a cakewalk! It's hard! You're not going to have all of your problems solved by getting married. " Of COURSE I knew that! I resented their patronizing tone, their assumption of idiocy and naivete on my part...everything about their attitude irked me. I also resented that they often assumed that I at 23 was as carefree and naive as they were whenever they were single. "Oh I remember when I was single all I did was eat out with my friends and go shopping". Fantastic- for the entire 6 months you were "single" you had fun. It was also fun for me for those first 6 months. 6 months in limbo is fun- until everyone moves on and you're stuck bent over backwards under that limbo stick. What people who marry early fail to realize is that most singles don't want a "Platinum Wedding" or a fantasy marriage. They want to work on the "happy hard work" of marriage. They want to come home to a spouse- and share their life with someone. They want to have a husband to argue and make up with.They want to wake up in the middle of the night for a baby. Sure, it's difficult but B"H it's a healthy difficult. It's growing pains. Since I got married I've grown so much, and learned so much about myself. Marriage and babies can sometimes be very painful- but it's growing pains. As opposed to the gnawing, seemingly endless pain of waiting- either to get married or have children. No, it isn't a cakewalk. Yes it is very challenging. But I wouldn't have it any other way.